After last week's lukewarm episode of True Blood, things are really starting to heat up. Sarah's efforts to conceal Governor Burrell's death have begun to come apart at the seams, making her more frenzied and maniacal than ever. Also, it would appear that both of the Stackhouse siblings might find themselves in eternally binding contracts: Warlow presents Sookie with an ultimatum, and poor Jason must come to grips with Violet staking her claim.
The end of the episode leaves almost half the cast just seconds away from death, and I'm already mentally preparing myself for a devastating final two episodes. We're going to need a lot of GIFs to sort through this week's insanity. Check out the full recap below!
When Eric Starts Insulting Billith
We all know Eric's capable of spitting fire when he's angry (figuratively, of course, although I wouldn't be surprised if he could spit fire in addition to flying), but it might not be a great idea to taunt a demigod who's already dealing with other frustrations. Let's just be glad Bill lets him go.
Rikki and the pack have gotten ahold of Nicole and her mother, and everyone's pissed because Alcide lied to them. Seriously though, did Rikki really think she could take Alcide? He's basically a giant, handsome brick wall at this point. I was also really torn here, because once Alcide goes in for the kill, part of me was like, "Kill her!" and the other part was like, "No, don't do it — you're better than this!"
When Vampire Violet Says Jason Is Hers Forever
Jason Stackhouse must have the strongest pheromones ever. The saddest part is when Violet is feeding on Jason and he asks her not to rape him. He has just been through way too much.
Check out the rest of our GIF recap when you read on.
When James and Jessica Have a Postcoital Cuddle Sesh
Hey, no time like the present, right? You go, Jessica! Am I the only one hoping they both make it out of Vamp Camp alive so that their relationship can blossom and flourish?
When Alcide Shows He Still Has a Shred of Humanity
What happened to Alcide? He used to have so much depth, but he's been totally one-dimensional all season. Luckily, we get a glimpse at the old Alcide when he returns Nicole and her mother to Sam and sticks around for a drink and a little heart-to-heart. I knew there was still a big, old softy underneath all those layers of rippling muscle.
When James Tells Steve Not to Drink the Blood . . .
Damn it, James!
. . . And Steve Caves and Rats James Out
I could see this coming from a mile away. James has shown he's too kindhearted to knowingly let someone suffer, and with Sarah Newlin at the head of all the operations, she knows better than anyone when Steve's hiding something and how to get it out of him.
When We Find Out Nicole Is Pregnant
Well, great. Just when I thought this story line was getting tied up with a nice little bow. Does this mean Nicole is going to become a series regular?
When Steve Newlin Won't Stop Crying Like a Big Sissy
I swear, if everyone gets in huge trouble for not drinking the Hepatitis V-infused Tru Blood, I don't know what I'll do. Steve seems to consistently follow the pattern of tattling, ruining everything, and then crying about it.
When Sookie Comes on to Sam?!
OK, Sookie's behavior is downright bizarre this episode. First she tries to seek advice from Bill, which backfires in her face, and then she tells Sam she wants to be with him after like five seasons of him lusting after her. And let's not even go into that weird voicemail she leaves for Jason before turning herself over to Bill.
When Arlene Freaks Out on Terry's Family
When Arlene says Terry's military send-off is the wrong way to bury him, she kind of has a point. Terry spent most of his time trying to forget his haunting past, so why make it emblematic of his life? Arlene also considers getting rid of Terry's life insurance money, but let's hope she doesn't. Maybe she can use it to somehow honor Terry in her own way.
When Sookie Figuratively Flips Her Parents Off
Warlow tells Sookie he'll help Bill if she promises to be his vampire-fairy bride forever, and she seems to really struggle with the ultimatum all episode long. She finally ends up at her parents' grave site: the most chilling line of this scene is when Sookie says, "I would rather walk this earth as a corpse than spend another minute thinking about you." Does this mean she's going to say, "Yes"?!
When Ms. Suzuki Knees Sarah Newlin in the Crotch
I've never rooted for a near stranger so hard in my life. This was only the second episode Ms. Suzuki appeared in, but I wanted her to pull the plug on Vamp Camp so bad. The best part of this prologue to the chase scene is when Ms. Suzuki tells Sarah she's crazy, and she says, "I'm gettin' there!"
And Then Sarah Newlin Kills Ms. Suzuki With a Stiletto
This chase scene is a perfect example of the classic True Blood we all know and love: ridiculous and macabre, with a touch of graphic violence. Damn, Sarah! Between smashing Ms. Suzuki's face into the grated floor, the vampires freaking out underneath, and the stiletto stabbing, I was ready to collapse. For a brief moment, Sarah looks absolutely horrified by what she's done, but instead she says, "Thank you, Jesus!"
When Jessica Says, "We're All Gonna Meet the Sun in Here"
As soon as Jessica said it, everything clicked, and I was like, "No, no, no!" Bill hasn't been able to prevent any of his visions from coming to fruition thus far, so I'm worried. Come on, Billith! Get it together!
When Sookie and Bill Find Warlow
How did Eric get in there? Did he force Adilyn to take him through after he bit her? Is Warlow dead or just severely injured? Things are lookin' pretty bleak. Bummer, because I was kind of getting excited for vampire-fairy Sookie.